The Sensuality Deception, Balancing Hormonal Agents and the Brain

As I had my morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader composed in with a dating dilemma and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to get love, and guys utilize love to get sex." This is a terrific summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is comparable to the Love Trap, where songs analyze great sex as love. Those who fall into the Sex Trap go even farther because for these singles, having sex brings enormous significance and effects.

Songs fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of two ways:

A.they believe sex is a necessary test of compatibility, (if the sex is good then the relationship will ready also).

B.more frequently, all awareness heads out the window, and one or both previously level-headed songs consider themselves a committed couple as quickly as they make love.
So, instead of taking a look at whether this other person might be a match on levels besides physical destination-- such as long-term requirements, needs, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to stay connected with truth when all those hormonal agents are running wild. Our body responds to someone we are attracted to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural mood enhancers), and testosterone (increases sexual desire), which makes the chance to make love with somebody we are brought in to incredibly tough to withstand. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts upon the hypothalamus to produce feelings), that makes us feel really near and bonded with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are strong and involuntary , leading to effective sensations of destination, excitement, love, nearness, and well-being .

When issues arise, those who fall into the Sex Trap often justify by thinking, "Well, we've got issues, however the sex is great!" They probably would not confess, however they prioritize physical intimacy and relate to the rest as optional. Their primary scouting tools are sexual attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works primarily with gay men, states that many of his clients have actually fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay guys particularly in cities, sex is easily available, and that in itself is a trap," North states. "In addition, the culture, with its focus on physical appearance, motivates sexual activity. If a possible partner is going to be sexually suitable, many gay men desire to find out from the beginning. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to ready?".

North includes, "I think this is a 'guy' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to point out that chemistry is necessary. Chemistry is a provided that we can't manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it should be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry happen, though often it can grow gradually.

Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry threat relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication diminishes and truth hits.

To prevent the Sex Trap, you should stabilize your heart (and hormonal agents) with your head. This implies combining chemistry with sound judgment. While excellent sex is necessary for a sustainable relationship, you have to make your partner options Clicking Here by paying complete attention to your vision, worths, requirements, and objectives -- while feeling all those interesting sparks!

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